I hate this blog

I read about the rave bust in Utah the other day but I wanted to wait until after Bush spoke to the Veterans in Utah to post anything on it.

So, yesterday Illustrious Leader tears himself away from his vacation, the photo-op of his biking with journalists, then the photo-op that gave us the White House-approved photo of Bush’s bike several inches forward of Lance Armstrong’s (fine satire here on the Bush-Armstrong outing)…

Bush shows up in Utah to restate what he said on his weekly radio address, his weekly radio address having attempted again to lull sleep with:

“Our troops know that they’re fighting in Iraq, Afghanistan and elsewhere to protect their fellow Americans from a savage enemy…they know that if we do not confront these evil men abroad, we will have to face them one day in our own cities and streets.”

Such as at the below August 20th Rave?

The “war on drugs” took on a literal meaning this past weekend when SWAT Team agents in full military combat regalia stormed a RAVE an hour outside Salt Lake City, Utah. Covered in a recommended blog on Daily Kos is a firsthand account detailing what transpired at the event on Saturday, August 20, where military soldiers swooped on the crowd of about 1,500 people in the Spanish Fork canyon. The event’s promoter claims to have attained all the necessary permits to host the RAVE and even had an insurance policy of 2 million dollars.

According to the Salt Lake Tribune , Salt Lake City detectives wanted to “get their point across that such activity was not welcome in their area,” a point they made with more than 90 law enforcement officers and camouflaged SWAT Team members, vicious dogs and tear gas.

Crooks and Liars has it that a “source inside the Utah government reports that this action was undertaken out of fear that the Rave would be used to rally support for the protest against Bush’s Utah visit.”

The Utah County Military (oops, Sheriff) had this to say:

From several previous experiences with Rave parties of this size, a large amount of drug use and underage consumption of alcohol occur. In addition reports of sexual assaults, overdoses, firearm violations, vehicle burglaries, and numerous individuals drive from the party under the influence of alcohol and or drugs.

Utah County Sheriff’s Office Detectives interviewed several females that had attended a prior rave party in the Utah county area in the past month that had been sexual assaulted. These females stated that the combination of drugs and alcohol made them fear for their safety due to the groping and sexual assaults that occurred during the Rave party. In the last year alone one near fatal shooting was investigated by Utah County Sheriff’s Office at a similar party…

And since when do you bring in helicopters, attack dogs, tear gas and camouflaged soldiers over some pills, some marijuana, some mushrooms, and people driving away drunk? I guess a couple of days before the President comes to town.

Take a good look at now, not the future.

Helicopters, assault rifles, tear gas.

SWAT team in camouflage. Why the fuck in camouflage? Tell me what does camouflage do for a SWAT team person standing on asphalt? See the video here at Crooks and Liars. In the comments area is this:

I am a retired career military officer, and I am shocked at what I just saw. It seemed a very well executed operation that is totally not supposed to be taking place in the US and to US citizens. Were these guys Police? if so, then something is wrong here because that looked military to me.

Bush showed up to speak at the annual convention of the Veterans of Foreign Wars and everyone has read about it, everyone knows what he said, but here it is again:

“Each of these men and women left grieving families and loved ones back home. Each of these heroes left a legacy that will allow generations of their fellow Americans to enjoy the blessings of liberty. And each of these Americans have brought the hope of freedom to millions who have not known it,” Bush said, as if speaking to Cindy Sheehan, the California anti-war activist whose son Casey was killed in Iraq.

“We owe them something. We will finish the task that they gave their lives for … by staying on the offensive against the terrorists, and building strong allies in Afghanistan and Iraq that will help us win and fight — fight and win the war on terror.”

That’s police attacking Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania protesters on August 20th with pepper spray, attack dogs and yes, that’s right, tasers (see video here). The woman has just been shot with a taser gun (2nd pic). As you can see from the first pic she was already subdued. She was on the ground, subdued, on the ground when an office rrushed over and tasered her. A 68 year old woman was bitten by a dog and was hospitalized.

And what do you bet it has to do with this? How many vigils were there last week across the nation?

And Camp Casey, right outside Bush’s door…

And the September Peace Train.

While I’m working on capturing the stills from the videos, H.o.p. comes over when he hears the woman on the ground screaming as she’s hit with the taser. He wants to know if it’s the war. I tell him it’s people protesting the war. He looks at it. He was at a “Stand with Cindy” vigil last week. I could see the wheels whirring in his brain. H.o.p. likes to think I take good care of him. Every day when his dad leaves, he comes over to me and says, “You’re a great mom. You do a great job of taking care of me and keeping me safe while my dad’s at work. ” There’s no anxiety in his voice. For some reason, this is just something he does. He smiles and and wraps his arms around me and thanks me for being there with him and looking after him. That’s just H.o.p.

But before we went to the vigil he had asked me, “Are we going to the war?” And I’d assured him, “Oh, no, H.o.p. This is a vigil. This is other people who don’t like the war. We’re remembering peace today. Standing for peace.”

So today he comes up to see what I’m working on and he asks if that’s the war. I tell him no, that’s a protestor. And he stares. “Don’t worry, H.o.p.,” I tell him. “I wouldn’t take you any where that’s not safe.”

But I can see him imagining, and I imagine it too..

You know how much I hate this stinking blog? I don’t think you could imagine how much I hate this blog. Every day I think of quitting it. Two weeks ago I wrote a little goodbye post that I never posted. I didn’t post it because I knew that there’d be more I would want to catalogue. In a way, I catalogue it for H.o.p. I think maybe one day he’ll want to read some of what was going on when he was young. I think as long as I’m doing this, I’m forced to keep up on news that I might otherwise become too overwhelmed by to daily follow. But I hate doing it. And I hate this blog. It’s not fun for me. It’s not a pleasure. I know it doesn’t do a damn thing. Doesn’t make a damn bit of difference. I sometimes think of completely stripping it of the politics. I hate posting stories of H.o.p. along with this crap.

But it’s part of our lives. My life. His life. Our lives.

Anyway, H.o.p. If you’re reading here in the future, I hope there has been a shift before you’re old enough to really understand and care about things like this. You asked last week what could make the war stop and I remembered how it was for me when I was seven and Vietnam was going on. And I told you that when I was seven I used to wish upon the evening star that the war would end. I said it doesn’t always work. But it’s something you can do. You said, “That’s a great idea!” I hope that wish pays off and the rising disapproval of the war turns into no war and that then there is a backlash against the bad policies that have been treacherously, supposedly implemented to combat terrorism, but are about control of the people instead. I hope this country is forced to some degree of sanity before you’re old enough to really understand what all this is about, and that when you look at the below image of the “SWAT team” descending upon the Rave, I hope this blog hasn’t become my letting you know that things didn’t always used to be this way, that this was a scene you saw in movies of foreign wars, not camouflaged soldiers descending on the people. I hope instead you look at the photo and think, “Shit, things got crazy there for a while.” I hope you don’t instead think, “That’s the only way I’ve ever known it to be like” when you examine the shot of the “SWAT team” descending upon the Rave.


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8 responses to “I hate this blog”

  1. Jay Taber Avatar

    I, too, need to leave the chronicling of demise mostly to others so inclined, and find it acceptable to honor those making noble sacrifices in order that I might pursue more joyful encouragements. There will always be warriors willing to do battle with what we call evil, but they in turn require guidance, healing, and varieties of support that only caring elders can provide. The elders also need to take care of each other, especially in the troubles to come.

  2. steve Avatar

    It does suck, you know, keeping up with all this, but you can also just back off and blog maybe 2 or 3 times per week.

    I like what you are doing. Its well written and thoughtful.

  3. Stephanie Avatar
    Stephanie

    I like your blog. I can understand why you don’t, because one of the things I like about reading you is your willingness to write about the painful things, the uncertain things. It’s got to be terrifying to be raising a child in this crazy world. I hope I can do something to make what you’re writing and agonizing about things of the past for him.

  4. Jim McCulloch Avatar

    I can understand your desire to kill your blog. I have a blog myself, and occasionally consider ending it. (The blog, not everything.) But if I didn’t have a blog, I’m afraid I would read or see the same horrible stuff on the web as I do now, and feel just as bad about it. The collective left blogosphere probably does do some good in the world, even if, say, mine, individually, does not. Yours is well researched and informative, and often has stuff in it people would never see, and which needs to be documented.
    Keep it up if you can.

  5. Jim McCulloch Avatar

    Plus, you’re a good writer, and a thoughtful voice.

  6. Tish G Avatar

    I”m glad you decided to keep your blog, idyll…and, you are right to think of it in terms of being not just commentary but also a chronolgy or memoir for your son. When most of us are fleabloggers in the Technorati Long Tail, we have to sometimes consider what we are doing and why. It isn’t always about getting large numbers of readers, or elevating our blog’s status to that of The Huffington Post, but more for the stories of our times and for the conversations around those stories….

    Would you believe I ran a rave back in the early days of raving some 15 or so years ago? Yes, little old neurotic me ran a rave with a bunch of friends. I was very disappointed when, well after I got out of it, ecstacy became a major part of raving. Raving did stop being the all-night natural-high feel-up parties that they started out as. Still, there is no reason to send a SWAT team into a rave. Why not send a SWAT team into one of those lovely Spring Break gatherings at Daytona Beach (which are, I might add, far worse)? It seems that Rebellion and Free Expression are fine, as long as they are the accepted forms thereof.

  7. Kate Avatar

    A stunningly powerful post. Please don’t quit. We need you. It’s okay to merge the personal and the political when the latter so impacts the former. We have no choice, do we?

    Take care —

  8. cruelanimal Avatar

    I know how you feel. Sometimes I hate my blog and want to quit, too. Facing another post is like making the rounds on a cancer ward some days. Everything often seems overwhelming and useless.

    But you’re a gifted, insightful writer — and every lost voice makes that daily walk through the ward a little worse…and then the madness of the world becomes a bit more insufferable. I’d hate to see an empty space here.

    Poet Maxine Kumin once said: “All poetry is political. All politics are personal.”

    And, hey, maybe a five-week vacation is what blog doctor ordered. I hear it’s the sport of kings.

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